I got an e-mail message today. The message read something like this -
It has come to our attention that a percentage of batteries sent out with our Compaq Presario portable PCs may severely overheat, possibly causing fire, or, in rare cases, explosions. We are cooperating with the US Consumer Product Safety Commission to proactively recall laptops which may contain said exploding batteries. This list has been expanded from the last three recalls, dating April 20, January 30, and October 14. If the serial number on your laptop begins with any of the following letters
(a list of at least 26 letters follows)
and you are currently using the laptop, calmly step away from the machine. Try to remain calm as you remove the plug from the outlet. If you are lucky, the battery will die before it explodes. If you are positive your settings have been changed to power off when the laptop is closed and you are feeling especially brave, you may lower the lid with a broom stick. We highly recommend giving the machine a minimum 10' berth until it has returned to room temperature. If you are using a different machine, please visit our website now for information on how to deactivate the ticking time bomb your child is playing with in the other room.
Thank you and we hope you purchase Compaq again!
(okay, it might be slightly paraphrased...)