Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Phil the Groundhog

That damn groundhog was right again. Which makes me begin to wonder – if we killed the groundhog, would winter last forever…or would it just become summer immediately? The way this winter has been going, it might be worth a try. Then again, with the way this winter has been going, I sure as hell don’t want to spend the rest of my life in –15 degree weather.

On that note, who the hell gives Phil the Groundhog the right to predict the weather? The right to make the weather? So here’s the thing. Supposedly this little groundhog pops out of his hole once a winter (of course, always on February 2nd) and if he sees his shadow, assumingly he gets scared, and runs back into his hole. Now, let’s analyze this. If that little groundhog sees his shadow it means that the sun must have been out. I can’t see my shadow right now. The sun is covered by clouds right now. Big, grey, wintery looking clouds. So if the sun is out, one would assume that winter is actually closer to being finished. Really then, if Phil the Groundhog gets scared by his shadow, shouldn’t winter end earlier rather than later? Or if Phil the Groundhog doesn’t see his shadow, doesn’t that mean the sun wasn’t out and it’s going to be winter forever and he ran back into his hole only because it’s so fleeping cold??

As it stands, Phil the Groundhog seems a bit hypocritical.

Not only that, if I can believe the statistics provided by google, Phil the Groundhog is correct only 39% of the time. That’s less than half. Which means MY opposing prediction is actually more correct. Sees shadow – LESS likely to be winter for the next 6 weeks.
On a different point of view – the little groundhog is correct 39% of the time because 39% of the states are far enough north to always have winter for the next 6 weeks. The other 61% of the states are never in winter for the entire 6 weeks beyond February 2nd. If this is the case, Phil the Groundhog is an utter cheater. And I think he deserves his punishment.

The death penalty.

1 comment:

  1. Phil is indeed a hypocrite and cheater. What a jerk! :)

    ReplyDelete